from the bottom of my heart...

i know this has been long overdue. things go so fast that i still can't believe i'm a married man. with all the turmoils and rollercoaster rides before the wedding, i can't tell you how calm i am and how surreal i feel trying to grasp that i finally sharing lives with the one i love for so long. here goes...

mama
for being there when i needed someone to hold me strong when things weren't going as i planned them to be. i love you for all the effort, energy, time and money that you've spend to make things even more beautiful than i expected.

i love you for going out shopping with me at jalan masjid india to prepare my wedding attires and our family attires. for preparing the lovely doorgifts. you made beautiful hantaran decors! i love them so much. you made them exactly as how i wanted it to be. with white fresh roses! i love you for selecting the beautiful yet modest venue. dealing with the caterers and the decorators. i love the white roses and lilies decors.

thank you for the post-wedding tokens! really helps me a lot when you know i'm starting a new life. thank you for the honeymoon tokens! oh my god, you're the greatest mom one could ever wished for in the whole world. i love so much now i love you even more. i missed you so much...

baba
few days before the wedding i had a glimpse of what is it like to have a father to look up to again. thank you for the cash when i was really, really down to my last cents. thank you for making mama happy. thank you for being there for her at the last crucial stage. thank you for being there on the day... i never realised it but i missed you so much.

my brothers
i am going to miss all of your laughters, your shouts, your quarrels, your smiles and your comfort silence at home. to all of you, thank you so much for helping out the details during the day. i don't know who did what but i love you guys for just being there and giving me the support. i love you guys for being such responsible and dependable brothers.

my relatives
i really don't know how mama can handle everything without every and each one of you who came down to our house. thank you for helping mama with the hantarans and the decors. thank you so much for helping out during the nikah and at the reception. we'll visit this raya! :)

kepal and nadia
thank you so much for being there for the both of us. thank you so much for being such patient friends. thank you so much for listening and supporting us all these years. you guys are great friends! no, you guys freaking rock!

nash, gee and anis (candidsyndicate team)
thank you so much for putting so much effort in making us such a beautiful couple both on our receptions. both real time and in photos. thank you for being patient with our moods. you guys are awesome. we love you all so much!

din (member of panorama team)
thank you for taking the video for us. thank you for your patience. i hope to see you again soon. you cool!

papa and mummy (s' parents)
thank you so much for accepting me in your house. thank you so much for making my wife so happy. thank you so much for making me feel welcome. i like the both of you so much and i try not to get on your nerves too much. haha!

and my beautiful friends...
there are too many to mention... although i would personally like to give my highest gratitudes to wan, am, maok, david, ili and marlina, for their warmest friendship one could ever wished for. i really love you guys.

thank you all my friends for taking the time to come to my wedding. it means a lot to me seeing you guys smiling and having a good time. thank you for the gifts and tokens. i really really love you all!

and finally...
i took my time to get where i am. i worked extra hard for everything. to make a beautiful wedding for the both of us. to make something memorable. but in the process i realised it was not just about the money... what i really appreciate is the comfortness and the support from others around me, my beautiful family, my darling friends and warm strangers who acknowledged my presence.

from the bottom of my heart i thank every and each one of you, people who touches both our lives, again and again for your blessings...

with much love, d

ps: as i'm writing this, we're somewhere in an island in thailand... s is having her bubble bath. i'm enjoying free wifi. i love the comfort silence between us. it's calming when you really love someone... it feels like falling in love again and again every day.

thank you, thank you, thank you

i, would personally like to thank the following people;

mummy - for planning every single thing and detail. from picking out my outfits to coordinating the event. im sorry i was never good at making decisions. its better that you made all the decisions anyway. even though the one outfit i picked was rejected by you and later you bought it anyways to wear it to the other reception. for telling me my akad make-up was fugly, so i could fire her on the spot and hire a new emergency one or risk looking like a cow. for locking the kitchen cabinets so i could loose a few kgs. for driving me around KL for the fittings. for deciding on the perfect bed and mattress until i nearly died of starvation after 4 hours of mattress testing. actually, i wasn't keen on the last one, it was just because i wanted to get it over and done with that i lay there and didnt want to get up and test the others. for understanding that Da Vinci furniture is so not my thing. for fulfilling the request of your daughter who hates nasi minyak that we would not have nasi minyak for the reception. for requesting your batik factory friend to come over and do my henna tattoos complimentary. for working hard with the wedding planners while i sat playing paris hilton diamond quest, yawning every ten minutes. for giving me the chance to make all the decisions which i never did. i have never imagined that i would have a beautiful lakeside evening garden wedding. flowers and lights. for all that you've done, you will always be the one.

papa- for doing all the necessary paperwork for the application so i didnt have to move a muscle for the tedious process. plus we all know how sore i can be dealing with government officials. for dealing of application of signages (seriously, putrajaya can be such a pain. naik signboard pun kena ade ruling). for application to park illegally alongside the road. for performing the nikah even though the ustaz was such a pain and decided to pick on you with his questions instead of the groom like they usually do. bersungguh je D menghafal rukun nikah, tayamum, doa qunut dan sebagainya, orang lain pulak yang kena tanye..
for putting up with mummy's wrath because you waited till the very last minutes to do things. for being the cashier. for being ever so agreeable that mummy misconstrued it as not being bothered. for all that you've done, im still your little girl and you still have to pick me up and pulls strings to get me what i want. :P

my sisters - for leading the walk on the red carpet. for rehearsing with the flower girls. for repairing my makeup so i didnt look like a cow. for making sure things were in place even though you guys take a lot longer than me to get ready and i was ready to scream. for secretly massaging my cramped feet cos i can never bersimpuh for more than two minutes. for accompanying me when mummy took me to hours of pointless shopping for the event. i would've gone mad alone.
thank you girls.
yana (hanif's gf), gee (my sister), hanif (D's brother) - during D's reception

wani (my sister), aizat (D's brother) - during D's reception

my brothers - seriously i don't really know what you guys did for me. expect melarikan my bridesmaid for ciggie breaks in between the ceremony. and having a party on the third floor till i couldnt sleep on the eve of my wedding till i had to wake mummy up and she barged in your room and it reeked of cigarettes. oh but you guys did help buy D's contact lenses two hours before the reception - emergency. and then the little kid who tagged got lost at the mall and you guys were late and D was frantic and by the time you got home there was no time to wait for you to get ready that we had to find another ride to the jetty to ferry our way to the lakeside. no worries boys, im still here to fix your midnight hunger meals.

the crew who helped me a lot; am, abby, maisarah, irna, azwa, heidi, arni, malik, ashraf
thank you. thank you. thank you.words fail me. '
sorry for not spending enough time, hope you understand.
please, please, please forgive me for my violent mood swings and snappy behavior.
being a bride is so stressful. i don't recommend it. was completely high strung.
Mummy and us will be hosting a thank you dinner. will update everyone by cell.
Please attend. I'll be nicer this time. Without all that make-up im a completely different person.
Much much nicer and a lesser control freak.

anis - holy crap! what would i have done without you.
with my entire make-up crisis i was in no mood to smile and was seething every minute of the way. thank god you held my hand, took a look at my cow face and told me that you would make everything okay. im sorry im restless and am completely unable to hold my head still. im sorry that my eyes cant accept any foreign objects and water so easily that the false eyelashes would not stick. thank you for being in the background with a bottle of eyelash glue. thank you for being patient with the fact that my eyelash fell off even before we got on the boat and it caused a fifteen minutes delay and everyone was standing around waiting for my eyelash to dry. thank you for holding my veil during the hot sun photo shoot so it would appear that my veil was flying beautifully in the wind when actually you were the one holding it up and they're gonna photoshop your picture so you don't appear in the pictures. thank you. thank you. thank you.
i know im fussy, bossy, demanding and sulky. but im a much nicer person without the eyelashes!

nad-yah! & kepal - one inexperienced and one three time pengapit. job nicely done.
thank you dear nads for making sure no one steps on that two meter veil and the kain's train (serious letih, berat kepala!) and making sure that my nose wasn't sweating before running off with my brother for a nicotine fix and realizing that the little flower girls were staring at you only after lighting up.
next time don't come up to the high table asking "are you okay dear? cos i nak pergi isap rokok ni" cos i think my mom and grandma may have heard you. thank you so so so so so much for being there during nikah, saying goodbye to yet another friend who's gone over to the other side to join the sad married life. for picking up my baju from the designer's after that stupid last minute alteration. some people just don't learn. you've done wonders for the both of us. god bless you babe.
thank you kepal for being there, driving all the way to putrajaya for two consecutive days. you've been great even though you were hitting on my sister during the red carpet walk that she lost concentration while carrying my veil and stepped on my train and that pissed me off. im sorry our reception offers no booze. we'll get you drunk some other day kay?

photographers & videographer - sorry, i didnt smile at all during the nikah. i was pissed and was in no mood.
i didnt look at the camera, i didnt wanna talk and i was so irritated.
sorry that i snapped even after you told me everything was okay and i had to look happy not like as though someone had just died.
im sorry with your cold and all i didnt offer to switch off the air conditioning as heat would've made me even more crankier. haih, selfish nye saya ni. sorry if i was fidgeting the entire time at D's reception as i absolutely hated that baju like hell. the alterations were bad and i felt fat and frumpy. i hate that baju!!!!!!! ok dah. im probably the crankiest bride you'll ever meet. i don't think i can ever pay you enough to deal with my tantrums.
i was sooooo glad the entire thing was over that i was totally in a good mood during the outdoor shoot. even though it was boiling hot and my eyelashes were hanging off my face.
thank you, thank you, thank you.

D's Mama- erm. yes i am demanding. yes i am difficult. yes i am stone cold.
the question is, how do you put up with it? ive never seen anyone deal with me with such patience. D must have taken after you. thank you for understanding me. thank you for understanding why i bathe only once a day. why i eat only when served and not find my way through the kitchen. why i need to lie down in the middle of the day when ive done absolutely no housework. i dont know how some girls can just barge into their boyfriends homes and start doing the dishes and folding the clothes. i cant. i freeze. that's why i prefer to ask you directly "can i help you with anything?" when you told me no and told me to lie down instead, thats exactly what i did. i seriously have no idea how you train your boys but they amaze me. they wash clothes, hang them, take them in, wash dishes and do pitch in with everything in the house. the last time i hung out stuff to dry was probably back in form 5 after scrubbing my school shoes. sigh.
"i train all my boys to do housework, S. nanti dah kawin senang bini masing2. kalau dah ade rumah sendiri nanti, suruh je D buat semua housework." erk.
and when u hugged me in front of all those people and told them i was your new daughter 'tapi belum pandai nak panggil mama' - thank you for understanding, auntie.
for the beautiful etienne aigner bag you got me. for the beautiful hand bouquet you made like how i exactly wanted it only to have me throw it to a bunch of single chicks, where it all fell apart. for the fresh white roses hantaran you handmade exactly the way i wanted it.
for everything.
you never had a daughter, let's hope you have no regrets.

to the people who made me look the way i did -
man kajang - that baju nikah and shoes. ketatla kain. dahlah kena bersimpuh lame...cramp la
radzwan radzwill - the garden reception outfit. so many compliments. thank you for not wincing when my waist was gazillion inches. and thank you for the flawless alteration when i lost a few inches. im so in love with the baju. its hanging there waiting for something to happen.
amin jauhary - sigh. you never got anything right. the alterations were so so bad. i was so dreading D's reception. My arms looked huge! but you were nice enough to rework again and again when you saw my near tears face. i can't say im 100% happy, but some people during the reception did say it was nice, so i'll let it go.
romy from jakarta - for the selendang akad. wow. sparkling and swarovski. it got stuck everywhere. so messy. im hanging it for good, its beautiful yet too difficult to wear.
kareem al-khadani - for the henna tattoos. what an honor! erra fazira, sheila majid and now you're doing mine for free. let's just hope my marriage last longer then theirs did.

and the rest of them all..
Jay Yee of The Carat Club for D's ring -sorry we took forever to decide what to engrave. not easy putting 7 years of love into one inch of space.
My Dear Friend Lucillus - for driving me around the eve of my akad getting my last minute things done. Thank you for being patient and driving ever so slowly since the fragile sugar boxes were filling up in the back seat. Rimas kan? I pun rimas mase tu. Thanks for coming and sitting in the front row. You were the first person i saw during the red carpet walk and i instinctively smiled. Tak sangka you came with your supervisor from whom you extorted the A for your thesis. And your date wasn't too bad either. Hehehehe, why i interview her you drag her away? you scared ar?
D's brothers - we use to hang out and party and smoke together. now you boys are kissing my hands. wonders never cease. but seeing you guys stripping down to your boxers tu dah biase sangat. no surprise there.


a moment with the new sister.
kesian my hand bouquet. dah takde bunge...

Gamelan UKM-so beautifully played. i love Gamelan! when you guys took pictures with me, i heard one guy said 'cepatla..nak letak kat friendster ni!'. Bless you all. Hope all you of get A's.
Kak Ju and Diddy- thank you for working with mummy and planning out the beautiful reception. sorry i couldnt contribute more, never good at weddings, never liked them.
All those who came to my reception - thank you berry berry much. hope nobody gets mad when i say this, but we really didnt have the time to open the mountain of gifts. they were there under the stairs until the fourth day and mummy started complaining of the space they took. so i told D we really should start unwrapping them ASAP. we have four rice cookers, bohemian crystalware that rivals the whole of mummy's collection, tonnes of aussino bed sheets, table wear and what not. i guess that pretty much sums up of what is expected of a married girl. interesting stuff include, a set of baby clothes which annoyed D and a set of book titled '20 cara menjaga hati suami/isteri'. my gf's from uni gave a beautiful candle stand with a scented candle. other single frens gave tonnes of photo frames. i guess married people tend to be more practical with gifts hence the blenders and rice cookers, where as single people are more romantic. A table lamp from AIEU was D's favourite.
Those who came to D's reception - he'll do the thanking, hehe. but we were just curious about two unnamed gifts which we absolutely love. one is the personalized square glass plate with our names hand painted on them done in bangsar and the other one is the painted wooden key box. thank you we love all your gifts. and we love all the ang pows!

thank you. thank you. thank you.

ps; to all the single ladies, please don't rush into getting hitched. enjoy. single hood is by far the besterestest time of your life. we had a 7 year relationship without ever discussing of getting married. it wasn't until he proposed last Dec 06, that we started to really think about it. eight months later, it happened. take your time, no hurries. i had hell a hard time convincing myself marriage was for me. The only reason im married is because im sure that i know D well. He has my trust and i know im safe around him, and that he'll take good care of me. And also i can't imagine life without him..:)

how i met the rest of my life

D. recent photograph.

S's story

it was back in February 2000.

It was party girl period. Every other day. Or whatever we could afford with our undergraduate pocket money. We were a foursome. Jan, Wan and May. And me. We were staying in Jan's single room. Allowed to puff away without annoying roommates.

Wan was dating this guy from MMU Melaka. Once in a while he would come to KL and meet up with her. Ive heard a lot about the guy but had yet to meet him. Wan was brushing her hair one afternoon and telling us that Nai - her bf would be coming over that week. I didnt take much interest except for the prospect for meeting Nai for the first time. Wan gave us a run down - we were not to mention to her bf that she smokes/clubs/go out on dates with other guys. Ok. Noted.

Jan suddenly asked "Nai dtg naik ape? Die tak drive kan?"
"D hantar. D amik die dari pudu"
"oo"

I suddenly got curious,
"D sape?"
"Kawan Nai. Budak MCC jugak"
"Handsome tak?"
"Isk ko ni. Die ade gf la.."
"oh ye ke?"
"he's such a sweetheart. and he adores his gf so much"

they start making all the oohs and aahs sounds.

"yknow S, one time i went with him to buy his gf's birthday gift. he got her an esprit dress, cardigan and put it in a guess? bag he bought for her. and then posted it to her on campus"

more oohs and aahs.

yeah okay. whatever.

im not interested in any guy who thinks his gf is the most fab human on earth. anyways, why would i be interested? i had a bf i was on the verge on dumping and a guy i was regularly seeing, Haf, who was soo cute. Except that he drinks - and i hate guys who drink. And he was short - he's the same height as me, and i am not very tall mind you. And he couldnt drive. I had to drive on all the dates. hmm.

that weekend, after a long night at some club, i woke up late in the afternoon to see Wan getting ready for her big date. Apparently this dude named D was gonna come over with Nai to take Wan out for dinner, and Wan wanted me to tag along so that i could keep D occupied while they make out or whatever in the backseat .

they arrived that evening, i didnt shower. i didnt see the point for getting all dolled up for nothing. Wan was smelling heavenly, groomed and dressed to impress her Nai. I couldnt care less. Wan told me to go out and meet them first. I walked out. Nai was out there. I introduced myself. D was in the drivers seat. I couldnt be bothered. Nai and I had our small talk before Wan yelled for Nai from the balcony of her room. Nai left me there sitting on the curb behind D's car.

Then D came out. I smiled at him. He took one look at me and said

"hey, saya suka la awak. muka awak macam cina.."

I giggled. He smiled. God, im such a sucker for lines.

The dinner was in uptown. And then he suggested we go to Sunway and play some pool. I said i didn't know how to play. He said neither did he. I said maybe next time? ( Actually, from that day till this very day today, we have never, ever, ever got around to playing pool)

Anyways, half of the time, i was looking around for a pay phone to call that Haf guy. D offered me his phone. I declined on the basis that i wanted to talk a little longer than whatever airtime he had on his mobile. Isk.

On the ride home, i didnt know what prompted me, but i called my bf, A and broke things up with him. It was a no-brainer anyways. A waste of my time.

We said our goodbyes. He asked for my number. I told him - like you'd call anyways. He laughed.

He didnt call me. I wasnt expecting him to call. It was only much later i found out that in fact he did call Wan asking about me, but Wan was somewhat hesitant for us to hook up.

(Dont ask. She's weird that way)

I'll spare you the boring details.

Our first date was two weeks after that. He took me to see Sleepy Hollow. And then dinner.

I was hooked and in love with someone who had a long distance girlfriend.

Red lights were blinking.

(Wan broke up soon after and married a much older guy who looks like Dato' K.

Nai dated my sister briefly and then dropped out of MMU to become an MLM success.

My ex-bf A briefly stalked me after the breakup. He now is married and has a kid. I still hate him like hell.

Haf was frustrated when i started dating D. He left the partying scene, worked his ass off and married a girl his grandma picked for him. We started chatting on YM a year ago and he apologized for any pain he caused me in the past. He's on his way to two kids and is very much a changed man. He adores his wife and daughter and often shares pictures of his happiness with me.)

.......
D's story

it was back in February 2000.

i was a nerd (still am. period.)

i was trying to cope up with my 1.6 gpa from last semester because all of us rebelled to the sudden change of college transfers.

the family was cracking up and i refused to go home.

my gf at that time was cheating on me in UTM. i was still in a relationship but never really wanted to mend things up.

and, i was secretly dating this girl, way older than I was (i was 21, she was 26) whom i met thru IRC (told you i was a nerd!)

i had this close friend back from MCC years, Nai. Nai and Wan were dating each other . Nai flunked PPP Shah Alam and went back to Kuantan. The gf was in UKM. Every other weekend he would come down to KL to visit Wan.

One weekend he called me up saying he was gonna come down to KL to visit Wan. He needed my help to be the driver. Mind you i was the nerd with the coolest car in town, ok?

- "Ko nak datang KL?"
- "Haah. Jom teman aku jumpa Wan?"
- "Tgkla dulu..." (knowing i would be the driver and the third wheeler)
- "Jom aaaaa... aku kenalkan ko ngan kawan Wan ni..."
- "Dah la Nai, ko kenalkan kawan2 ko kat aku tgk la pointer aku last sem..."
- "Jom aaa..." (repeat 1000000x)
- "Ok laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Ko sampai aku call ko aku amik kat Pudu."

so that day came and i picked him up and went straight to UKM. we parked in front of Wan's building which was quite dark.

I met Wan first and she was in some baju tido. i said hi to her and talked a little. then came out this other girl also wearing baju tido and we were introduced.

- "Hi, D" i smiled.
- "Hi, S" she smiled back.

then i walked away to the sidewalk without a second look and started smoking. not even bothering to join all of them talking, laughing and all that.

the girls went back inside to change.

when they came back down, it was then i started to notice her.

i walked towards her to see her up close. she was this beautiful, petite, Chinese looking girl with bright eyes.

- "Eh... Awak macam cina la. Saya suka la."

i grinned and she sheepishly smiled back.

that night was the beginning of everything. i really can't remember what we did that night, where we went, what we talked about or did we even talked to each other at all! all i remembered i was just mesmerized by her presence. really it was like that.

but i didnt think she noticed that i already liked her that night; as she was busy looking for a phone to call a couple of guys. so i just kept it to myself. :P

we sent the girls back to UKM and we exchanged phone numbers.

on the way back, i told Nai,

- "Aku suka la S tu!"
- "Tula ko nasib baik ko ikut!"
- "Suka gila!"
- "Mula2 aku ingat nak bawak Ap (another college dropout friend of ours, who everyone thinks is cute) Tapi dia balik Bentong."

we laughed.

i didnt call her up the next two weeks.

We were only saying hi thru Nai and Wan. i dun think they really said anything back to S. which i found it funny sometimes.

i thought about S the next two weeks.

but it was that one day i was on the way home from KL that i gave her a call. i was so nervous that i hung up immediately after i heard the dialing tone. not really expecting that she would call me back but she did!

we said hi and we talked.

after a few phone calls, and i asked her out for a date for the first time ever. the next week i broke up with my gf.

(Wan broke up soon after and married a much older guy who looks like Dato' K.

Nai dated S' sister briefly and then dropped out of MMU to become an MLM success.

The last time i heard about my ex-gf, H, she's now working with JKR and dating a chinese dude and being active in a Kelisa club and a cat loving forum.

The IRC chick i dated a few times back then got married with an ex-Perak player and with children. Haha!)

you dream a suicidal dream...

i found myself waking up, eyes opened immediately after the impact. the fall was vivid that i can nearly feel the air brushing my cheeks. i swear there was a tear at the corner of my eye. then the impact came and again i almost heard the sound. you don't really hear sounds when you're having r.e.m.

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:13 PM
busy?

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:14 PM
not busy
7/23/07 4:14 PM
just doing some stuff
7/23/07 4:14 PM
but not extremely busy

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:14 PM
oo ok

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:14 PM
why ar?

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:14 PM
have you ever dream of falling down?
7/23/07 4:14 PM
saja je nak borak

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:15 PM
OMG
7/23/07 4:15 PM
all the time
7/23/07 4:15 PM
hah

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:15 PM
no like bukan falling down macam jatuh kerusi
7/23/07 4:15 PM
but macam falling down from a building

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:15 PM
yes
7/23/07 4:15 PM
pernah

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:15 PM
never had dat before
7/23/07 4:16 PM
but i dreamed it last nite
7/23/07 4:16 PM
it was quite a long fall
7/23/07 4:16 PM
so vivid la

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:16 PM
wow

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:16 PM
i dreamed till impact

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:16 PM
wht u think it mean

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:16 PM
macam betul2 mati

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:16 PM
yeah usually i pun like that

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:17 PM
betul2 macam hentak floor almost ada bunyi cos dreams you cant hear voices
7/23/07 4:17 PM
then terus celik mata

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:17 PM
yeah
7/23/07 4:17 PM
if u can itu ialah suara syaitan

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:17 PM
hentak terus bukak mata
7/23/07 4:17 PM
bukan terkejut
7/23/07 4:18 PM
like crash then eyes open
7/23/07 4:18 PM
like so weird

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:19 PM
TO UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF DREAM ABOUT FALLING ASK YOURSELF:

1. Am I over ambitious? Perhaps you have 'climbed above your station' and experiencing the 'pride before a fall'. You may have to lower your sights somewhat and set yourself goals that are more realistic.

2. Do I fear letting go? The dream may be urging you to stop resisting an impulse from the unconscious. The psychologist Strephon Kaplan-Williams suggests that you should relive the dream in your imagination and let the fall complete itself. In this way, you find out what is frightening you. You 'get to the bottom' of the problem.

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:19 PM
hmmmmmmm
7/23/07 4:19 PM
seriously?
7/23/07 4:20 PM
interesting
7/23/07 4:20 PM
tapi macam tak pernah tau

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:20 PM
As with most common dream themes, falling is an indication of insecurities, instabilities, and anxieties. You are feeling overwhelmed and out of control in some situation in your waking life. This may reflect the way you feel in your relationship or in your work environment. You have lost your foothold and can not hang on or keep up with the hustle and bustle of daily life.When you fall, there is nothing that you can hold on to. You more or less are forced toward this downward motion without any control. This lost of control may parallel a waking situation in your life.

Falling dreams also often reflect a sense of failure or inferiority in some circumstance or situation. It may be the fear of failing in your job/school, loss of status, or failure in love.You feel shameful and lack a sense of pride. You are unable to keep up with the status quo or that you don't measure up.

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:20 PM
i think so...
7/23/07 4:20 PM
i have a lot of that the last few months
7/23/07 4:21 PM
sigh
7/23/07 4:21 PM
but it was fun la actually

carrie bradshaw 7/23/07 4:21 PM
yeah me think so too

roboto-san 7/23/07 4:21 PM
like really suicidal fun
7/23/07 4:21 PM
macam relief
7/23/07 4:21 PM
then slam you hit the ground
7/23/07 4:21 PM
then reality kicks in...

thrill me

Last Friday, we went away for the weekend to a little city called Bandung..

Seriously. Are we safe at this hotel?

ultra-chic Paris Van Java. 'Paris di tanah Jawa'. Very delicious crowd. Beautiful people.

Waiting for Mummy buy CDs is seriously mind-numbing. She got insulted when the dude recommended Rossa and DewaDewi. She bought Radja, Dewa and Samson's latest. She tested all the songs. Cepaaaatlaaaaaaa Mummmmmyyyyyy!! (btw..i lurvvvveee Letto)
P.S Sorry Nads, they didnt have Tompi's first album. The only thing they had was the one i bought for you earlier.

I love JCO donuts. Love, love, love. Notice the uncanny resemblance to a certain donut chain at The Curve. Everyone went crazy over the new donut store. And they have like four flavors? Duh. JCO rocks any day.

Hey look! Thats Nidji's vocalist. No, its Samson's bassist.
No, it's D'LIMA!!! Bolehla. Dose of celebrity. He looks a lot better than on TV.

That is :The sister, G. Titi, a local friend
(get this - her real name is Seri Dewi Nepththy Nigrum.)
And that is my mommy. Happy sebab dapat CDs and good food. Yes. thats her happy look.

Thats me with Kak Ad. She's mummy's second cousin from Padang and came to meet us in Bandung.

mummy wanted to watch a movie. the only movie we hadn't seen yet that was showing was..
a bunch of locals were standing in front of the poster and laughing.
and that is the cinema waiting area. can drink beer and wait for the movie to start. hmpf!

We had a great time. As always. We spent Saturday in Jakarta which was overcrowded and dusty as usual. I don't usually put Bandung and Jakarta pics sbb balik2 bende sama, but this Paris Van Java is new and very swanky. I love it! Titi said hanging out at chic cafes or as we call it melepak is known as DuGem.

DuGem?
Duduk Gembira.
Oh! Short form?
Ya. Tapi kalau clubbing juga dipanggil DuGem.
Tapi kan kalau clubbing dgn lepak kan lain?
Dunia Gemerlapan.
oh wow. DuGem terus terusan saya kalau disini.

what was intended as a short four day spa thingy with no shopping ended up in the three of us being charged for excessive baggage at the airport. we're allowed 15kgs each, which totals up to 45kg of baggage for the three of us. instead, we took to the airport 120kg worth of baggage. damn. had to pay RM1K for excess baggage. plus we got taxed at LCCT.

hmm. now i get it when mummy told us to bring huge suitcases with only three pieces of clothing each. we went with huge empty bags. ha-ha. mummy took with her a huge suitcase with another smaller suitcase inside. 'for hand luggage mase balik.'

work sucks. saya mahu selalu duduk gembira.