Happy Birthday Erfan...!

what do you do when youre faced with the dilemma of what to buy for a-kid-who-has-absolutely-everything's first birthday? easy. buy him whatever his mom does because anything less just wont make the cut. lucky boy. to have a 27 year old mom earning 12k a month. top that! even before turning one, we were scrutinizing him through his oshkosh sunglasses, brown baby guess curdoroys and ucob backpac..and that kid couldnt even walk yet!
today was break fast-cum-birthday party for baby erfan and we were all invited. had a feast of absolutely everything from secret recipe to kerabu mangga(!). fascinating.

kids are adorable arent they? but only at that stage. not up to the age when they decide your lipstick is the most fascintating toy ever and the wall is an equivalent of a whiteboard. or whatever truly outrageous shenanigans.
then its time not to smile.

its always an issue isnt it? kids or no kids. ive been living in kl a major part of my life and i see that all decisions DO NOT revolve around having children. in fact, i feel kind of sorry for those people who seemed engrossed in the fact that their sole purpose in life is to be bride and breed. heavy.
we definitely do not have to have children just to validate ourselves as a female individual. bad enough you have to be a mrs.somebody and now your somebody's mommy. who the hell are YOU?
hey, carrie bradshaw IS my role model(not SJP). are you gonna blame me?

maybe i will have kids. maybe i wont. i'll decide when i get paid 12k a month.

still life with toothbrushes..

been away yesterday doing something that hasnt been done in ages. me and D, together with baby sister, good fren K met up with one of D's favourite people KA and his adorable gf Z.



how long has it been precisely that we havent had such congregation and laughed the evening away? after leaving the the delightful seafood spread, we found ourselves at midvalley purchasing tickets for the bourne supremacy. kept us on the edge of our seats although for me it did seem a tad too fast. damn those bloody americans, always coming up with their own terms. i mean 'minister of interior'? dont we say minister of internal affairs instead? how odd.
this morning woke up with a massive splitting headache, dry itchy throat, and runny nose. shame. has it really been that long since we had late nights out? didnt think so.
congratulations to KA for landing a fabulous new career as a property writer for NST. hope you do have sufficient formal wear to accomodate your job. ;-)
my significant other's birthday is looming and i'm faced with another yearly routine of having to decide what will be the best gift ..ever! hell, i dont even know what i want for my birthday let alone decide for others.

but i do know that a bouquet of pink and white roses wrapped in newspaper or plain white paper would really make my day. and please none of that tacky printed plastics those florist always have. ugh

oh, and tonight my sister is back from college with yet another friend, my sister from residential school with another friend and my baby brother has two friends who do nothing but clear the fridge..i think my headache just got worse.

hope this horrible flu goes away very soon. i have a date on tuesday.

of canonballs and shooting stars..

blissful sleep up to noon..thats life. woke up had a look in the mirror, had a good fright! who the flippin' eck is that? ever since i got that haircut, bad hair days are a daily thing..i shouldve just listened to him and opted for a two inch trim instead.its just that i just adore being able to give into all my impulses and not having my panties in a twist later on. well apparently now i'm paying the aftermath of those so-called impulses. shame.
oh. the highlight of my dull day was receiving the phonecall from my best buddy, A. man! i missed her. she left town few months back, after having been packed off like a misbehaving child whom had just been sent to her room by her brother. damn. well, shes back in town only for a few days but good heaven knows what mischievious nonsense we'll conjure up once we meet up.. cant wait! maybe we'll have one of our infamous long afternoons at your apartment, bitching everything and anything about the people who tried to screw up our fantastic lives. (ugh. remember your stalker ex-bf, who jumped out of the hedge and dragged you off after our clubbing sessions?) sad dick. or maybe we'll just watch that black and white tv of your boyfrens, lying down after having eating too much chocolate and double cream oreos. or maybe we'll raid and watch your boyfrens really weird, sadistic porn collection..can't wait.

whatever it is we'll 'ave a blast.

D writes, when november rains

november is the best.

aside from me being an easily-agitated scorpio, i just love the month's weather. rainy, windy, dark and not forgetting the sudden 3-scale richter typhoons once in a while. what was that phrase again? hell, i'm only happy when it rains. tsk tsk...

how sadist can i be? but hey, don't get me wrong. though i'm that much of a pessimistic and paranoid joe, doesn't mean that i don't like the sun. hah! only when it sets!
whatever.

but then again, november is also one of the times when i always have these bad headaches. one of the too many disappointments is money. wait... isn't that like every month?

when it's november i have to deal with one major case - MY GIRLFRIEND'S BIRTHDAY. it's not that i'm complaining. hey, on that special day, you get laid like never before! (hurm... wonder how's it going to be this year?)

when it's her birthday, i will always have this unnecessary dilemmas like;

"what's for this year?"

"i gave that last year..."

"i'm on a tight budget, la sayang..."

and the worst of all;

"did i gave you anything last year?..."

tell me, how duh can you be?

but hey, i make it a point to myself, this year i try to make it extra special for her. and that means i have to save a little bit more, go collect my cash from whoever owes me (enal! bila nak bayar?), and go collect metal scraps and sell them. hehe.

lucky for me, it's fasting month. but then again there's raya after that. can i make an acception for not giving the kids ang pows this year?

*sigh

it's all or nothing..y' know

first day of fasting again after that six-day break. a bit tired, withdrawn and a lot of hunger pangs. shame on me.
met up with gurlfrens K and A. I just love our gurlie gossip sessions! brings the worst in each and everyone of us..don't they always? aint there a devil in each and everyone of us only detectable by the closest seemingly similar species? HELL, YEAH.
my other half called during midday asking for permission to break fast. the cute thing is his secretary picked up the phone and i caught snippets of her telling him 'nah, pemberi kebenaran kau dah telefon'. poor baby. im not such a controlling freak, owkay? (penat hari ni angkat sepuluh ribu kad raya).
manage to drag my lazy ass to the bazaar ramadhan in ampang. traffic congestion, unruly drivers, parking issues and terribly, terribly bad timing. who's idea would it be apart from my sister? as long as she's the one behind the wheel then i guess ill make room for exceptions. so shut up i did and succumbed to one of her yet again brilliant ideas.
i saw that famous 80's supermodel noorkumalasari with her 3 boys. it was all i could do to stop myself from smirking. not that there was anything wrong with her but what i had in mind was her botoxified, bee-stung lipped, bleached sister kak nita(as nasal as u can get). god i swear if she really did make it big in hollywood instead of being a caberet singer just so she could snag a confused white man to parade back here, she would have been whacko jacko's best buddy. how sad. i mean i'm very, absolutely positive she came tumbling from her mum's belly looking like that. oops i'm gonna stop..sorry aaa.
i mean this is a world of too much opportunities and too few morals so being a regular homosapien we do tend to slip up sometimes. or if you're me, too many times.
hey..did anyone realize that DiGi came up something awesome (or perhaps ridiculous, depending on how you look at it). apparently now customers can reload whatever amount they can afford to. bet thats gonna catch on with the kids.Hah. take that ananda krishna!

oops! pizza's burning. gotta go.

whatever happened to amelia earhart?

early morning today.good traffic flow in subang and on federal(surprise surprise!) put me in a lighter mood today only to be totally corrupted by my sister misbehaving and inability to ensure that her time management was at par with mine. my remark 'i think you have a problem with time management' didnt go down too well with her. not my fault.


devilish sister trying to attempt looking angelic..

bought breakfast and went over to kath's place..felt a pang of guilt about my eating habits when i saw her having bread(only) for breakfast.
hours later after agonizing over our plans for the coming months, i went back to bed..her bed that is. i guess i'm just such a sleepy head. all i ever do is sleep. i climb into the car i fall asleep, i see my frens i fall asleep, i see my boyfren i fall asleep..is everything a bore to me or am i a boring person? i'll opt for the latter just not to tread on anyones toes right now..tee-hee.
its just me lacking enthusiasm in the current events of what revolves around my world right at this minute. am seriously contemplating flying to jakarta next week just to escape from this monotonous routine. papa already agreed to buy my ticket..just the one thing holding me back is the thought of being away from my other half. ugh..i'm so clingy.
its tough being me..my reach often exceeds my grasp.

am missing someone very badly right now. if you had ESP, you would call me right now. (HA. fat chance)

this year's love had better last

it's such a warm day..too warm for mid october and that can't be too good a thing can it?*sigh*

woke up to the sounds of total peace, quite and tranquility. such a welcoming change from the bloody noisy and hectic weekend. i just love my own space. period.

i just think there's a direct correlation between the family weekends and temporary insanity. dont get me wrong here i love my family as much as required but putting up with every member during the weekend can sometimes defeat it's purposes. whew.

two always very angry pair home from college, baby sister home from residential school. and very scarcely they'll return without at least dragging another friend(kesian die...rumah dier jauh).

which means? late nights..late mornings..mindless chatters of adolescent girls and that cute guy in school..bla..blaa. tell me, is it better with the boys? huh..as far as it goes all i know is my brother and his friends( he does have really cute friends cept they are a good 6 years younger than me) do nothing apart from bong hits all night long...*sigh* i've never heard them laugh that loud before...???

soo much for our big happy family. well, everybody's happy i guess.

*sourpuss*

right now i'm just plain irritated. and it doesnt help that avril bloody lavigne is tearing her throat out. which is why easily-agitated peeps like me should just stick to sarah maclachlan and sade. TURN THE GODDAMN RADIO OFF!! thank you.

okay..i really need a ciggie right now.

one for the gurls....

1. When a girl says she's sad, but she isn't crying, it means she's crying in her heart.

2. When she ignores you after you've done something wrong, it's best to give her sometime to cool down before touching her heart with an apology.

3. A girl can't find anything to hate about the guy she loves (which is why it is so hard for her to 'get over him' after the relationship'sover.)

4. If a girl loves a guy, he will always be on her mind every minute of the day, even though she flirts with other guys.

5. When the guy she likes smiles and stares deep into her eyes, she will melt.

6. A girl likes to hear compliments, but usually is not sure how to react to them.

7. When a particular guy flirts with a girl very often, a girl would start thinking the guy likes her. So if you treat a girl just as a friend, go easy on the smiles and stare ok?

8. If you don't like a girl who likes you, break it to her gently.

9. If a girl starts avoiding you after you reject her, leave her alone for a while. If you still treat her as a friend, talk to her.

10. Girls enjoy talking about what they feel.Music, poetry, drawings and writing are ways of expressing themselves (which explains why most girls like writing journals).

11. Never tell a girl that she is useless in anyway.

12. Being too serious can turn a girl off.

13. When the guy she likes calls her for the first time, the girl may act uninterested during the call. But as soon as the phone is back on the hook, she will whoop with joy and immediately start calling her friends to spread the news.

14. A smile means a lot to a girl.

15. If you like a girl, try making friends with her first. Let her get to know you.

16. If a girl says she can't go out with you because she has to study, leave.

17. But if she still calls you or expect a call from you, stay.

18. Don't try to guess a girl's feelings. Ask her.

19. Hearing the words "I love you" is a great reassurance to a girl that she is beautiful.

20. After a girl falls in love with a guy, she'll wonder why she never noticed him before.

21. If you need tips on how to flirt with a girl,read romance stories.

22. A girl's ex-crush will always be in her memory,but the guy she loves now stays in her heart.

23. Girls love having fun!

24. A simple 'Hi' can brighten a girl's day.

25. A girl's best friends usually know best what she is feeling and going through.

26. Girls hate it when a guy pays attention to them just to get close to their 'prettier' friend.

27. Love means devotion, caring and happiness to a girl, in that order.

28. Some girls care about looks, some care about brains, but ALL girls want a guy who will loveand care for them.

29. Girls want nothing more than to feel loved

bored stiff

*sigh*



another pointless weekend about to leave me in the dust. only two days into the break and i'm already midway losing my mind out of sheer boredom. i guess i can't expect eveyone up and about since there are people who are actually fasting..and that includes daoh.(good on ya sweetie!)
right after carrie bradshaw and company's reruns yestarday i went straight to sleep. around 1 am daoh came over inviting me out for drinks. umm...no i dont think so sweetie..i'm sleepy and you just woke me up, so i dont think i'll be very good company.
something did happen during the weekend tho'...a bunch of frens were planning a surprise birthday treat for another fren, KS, only they told her they were just gonna take her for yum cha, so she better not make any plans. morning of the party, she came into the room while everybody was sleeping and delivered the news that she had to go back to her hometown.
most of them were still asleep so they didnt really register what she was on about..until someone heard her on the phone with another fren making plans to go to genting. OUCH!
knowing my girls..they're probably as mad as hell!! who's to blame? would you skip measly dinner to go to genting. maybe. i guess no one's really to blame. just pissed off because of her lies..careful KS, be very careful..
tragic weekend eh?

D writes, of having faith and believing

it's fasting month and to my surprise i'm still yet to skip a day.

for the last five, six years i have not being a good muslim. not praying, fasting and whatmore pay my 'zakat'. i don't really know what has got into me but i finally realized that being 25 and not believing in God is a combination of serious confusion and evil.

yes, i still do sins on and off but hey the end of the day i still need to pray. thinking and everything, most of my friends seemed to forget Him. even my brothers. even my little brother.

what has got into us? where in time did we stop believing? when did we lose our faith? feels kind of sad isn't it? anyway, everything is just a thought.

i work, sex, play, party and everything there is to bundle up sins but i guess life would be totally unmeaningful and empty if you just stop believing in Him. i guess its not that you're afraid of Him, you just have to fill that gap inside with faith.

i'm not being the 'good guy' here. i am the same person as before. people don't just change overnight. i just want to be a better person that's all. if not to mankind, at least to Him...

besides ain't life just wonderful knowing that you're gonna die as a good person

Joaquin Phoenix is sexy after all...

last thursday, amidst the hecticness and despite it being the fasting month, we managed to catch a movie- Ladder 49. Was well worth the two hours-some movies aren't, trust me on this. it was a drama kinda thingy..very sweet and very heart-wrenching. this movie gives you the aftertaste like you just have to appreciate what life has given you..two thumbs up. i cried buckets!! shame.
anyways joaquin phoenix is sexy after all though not at sexy as his late bro, river. and i had a treat of jay hernandez (remember the hot,hot guy opposite kirsten dunst in crazy/beautiful?). shame he had only a tiny part in this one.


jay hernandez looking mighty mighty hot..

anyways..i'm not fasting today. :-p....so i'm off for lunch.

A bleak Wednesday..

its wednesday-middle of the week. its too late too plan the week but too early to anticipate the weekend. today i have a classic case of midweek crisis and what could be a better cure than to see my near and dear for a dose that might lift my spirits?

decided that we were gonna break fast together and break fast we did. stuffed ourselves silly till we couldn't breathe. ugh. we were even too full to take a puff..that never happens!

spent the next hour pondering what happened to our frens we use to hangout with since now we're both fed-up of malls and resorted to sitting by the curb for a full hour before heading back home. aren't we the most exciting people on earth? oh wow.

excuse me while i pop out of my skin with excitement.

Oh, and by the way, today i found an inspiring quote indeed. At least for me.

"destiny is for losers. It's just a lame excuse for letting things happen to you instead of making them happen."

Maybe and Maybe-nots

Because maybe I’m wrong and you’re right.
Maybe I’m right and you’re not.
Maybe I’m bad-tempered and you’re stubborn.
Maybe I’m naïve and you’re arrogant.

Maybe I’m impatient and you’re cold.
Maybe I’m cheating on you and you’re a liar.
Maybe I’m dishonest and you’re manipulative.
Maybe I’m complicated, maybe you’re jaded.





Maybe I love you, maybe it’s just too much that it hurts so bad.
Maybe I care about you, maybe too much that I don’t care about myself.
Maybe I want you, maybe badly that I hurt you.

Maybe we can work it out, maybe we can’t.
Maybe we want to make it happen, maybe we don’t.
Maybe we want to be there for each other, maybe we can’t.

I hate hip hop!

came out of the exam hall an hour before time. i had no idea what just happened. it was not hard or tough. it was just unbelievably gruesome..i mean i absolutely have no idea why we need to study stuff that won't be relevant in my later life anyway..

i'm gonna marry daoh-whose gonna make tonnes of money anyway(that's what he said) and would never have to lift a finger or slave away at the mercy of others just to make a decent living ever again!! all i would ever need is a gym membership and a unlimited credit card. sheesh.

anyways, i just have to complete my goddamit studies just in case daoh the millionaire decides not to marry me!-okay i'm getting sidetracked here..

right after the horrible-horrible paper we decided to let off some steam by driving down to PD. 12 pm,100 degrees, 5 chicks in baju kurung, 1/5 fasting. what were we thinking?

kath,anu,aka & anita- you guys are a mad, mad bunch!!

Ramadhan is here again..

ramadhan is here again..

a month where drive thrus become notorious, second hand smokers rejoice while nicotine addicts silently mourn. fret not, it's all for the better..

despite patching things up with my better half, i still miss him terribly and wish i could see him ASAP! I hate it when we fight. Let's make love not war..

I'll leave things as they are right now and am goin back to sleep, hopefully until 4. Oh! I can't..we're having guests today..DAMN!

Thank You.

it's been a hectic and tiring week both this week and the previous one. i've been on my toes all day and now i feel as though all has been drained from me..*sigh*

exams are here once again and as usual like all the past examination i'll start making all these ridiculous vows not to study last minute and all those crappy stuff that i actually believe it myself. shame.

now i feel nothing but tired, lethargic and my body aches. and i'm on the verge of being a cranky bitch.*what else is new?*

on the upscale, last week was a plus point for me..it was after a whole busy day, i was once again the unpleasant gurlfren, refusing to smile for my other half, falling asleep while he was trying to attempt a conversation with me..Woke up, found myself at a mall and my bf decided that he was gonna make me smile and guess what he did? Bought me an mp3 player!

I felt guilty of course..so i told him that i didnt think i deserved it and he said ' i just wanted to see you smile'..Awww isn't that sweet..I forgot you were that sweet.. and sorry, i don't mean to flaunt.

Anyway, there goes the rest of your salary for this month.. Should I feel bad? If you need me to, I'll buy you lunch? OK?

D,being a bit silly and 'aving loads of fun!